Greetings everyone! I hope you have all had a chance to check out and enjoy a bit of Lightfall over the last couple of days. As we enter into a new year of Destiny, we will also be entering into a new year of TITS! I’m still working out some formatting tweaks to try and simplify the overall process and will have a signup form available soon for anyone interested in being interviewed.
This week, we had a chance to sit down with one of a very special guest that we have been waiting to interview for a very long time, Mama Verde!!
Hey Mama Verde, welcome to TITS. We’re excited to have you with us this week. First and foremost, what do you do to earn that bread?
I’m an antique dealer and estate sale liquidator and have been in the business for over 30 years. (I remember as a young Shua waking up early on the weekends to go to garage sales with you while you searched for treasure among the trash that people were looking to unload)
Aside from videogames, what hobbies or pastimes do you enjoy?
I’m obsessed with the hunt for antiques and vintage treasures. I love the business sooo much. Every day is different and always a challenge (in a good way). I love to fish too! And I really love being around my adult children, their significant others, and three adorable grandchildren. (Is that why you never take me up on my offers to go fishing? Though I guess waking up early enough to be at the lake by 3:30am is a lot to ask of someone who is usually in bed by 8…)
What is a skill you have that you take pride in?
I’m not sure it would be considered a skill so much… but I’d say “compassion”. I’m a nice person and I do like the human being I’ve become. (I want to come up with something funny to say here, but it’s just too true about being compassionate. Mama Verde isn’t one to toot her own horn, but several years ago she started an “Elf Program” in her community where people and businesses can “adopt” families in need for the holidays and contribute towards their holiday needs and wishes. This program has had a huge impact on her community and she deserves a ton of recognition)
Any fun facts about yourself?
Fun for who? If you mean me, I love nature – including bugs and frogs and snakes and all sorts of things! I will never grow up… I will always be a dork… and I’m totally happy being this way! I save worms, and spiders too… Earthworms that find themselves stranded in rain-filled areas and spiders anywhere. If there’s a big house spider downstairs, that’s just fine with me. I thank her for doing her job and tell her to have a nice day. (Also true. Spiders are our friends, except for that Eliskni one)
Have you ever actually played any video games?
I’d be embarrassed to share which ones… (It’s Pong.)
What are your favorite foods, music, movies, shows, etc.?
Favorite food is (and always will be) a hamburger. I love old country music (think about Willie…) (Nelson)! I rarely watch movies… and weirdly enough, even though the tv seems to be on most of the time, I don’t really watch that much… but every chance I get to watch a Disney cartoon with my 28-month old granddaughter, I’m all in! (Mom, she’s two. You don’t need to specify months after they turn two. I don’t go around telling people that I’m 448 months old. Oh fuck… now I feel extra old)
What would you put in the suggestion box for Clan Truth?
You should probably start charging people for the service your clan provides.
What do you know about Destiny? How would you explain the game as you know it to someone that’s never played it?
I would defer to Shua!
Which class has the best jump?
Warlock, obviously. (Damn right mom)
Who is your favorite admin?
Hmmm… gotta say Shua. I kinda like him. (Only kinda?)
That covers the standard questions, let’s get into the things people really want to know.
You have three children, with Shua in the middle. Who is really your favorite child and why?
The answer totally depends on which child asks. Why, it’s Shua, of course!!! (I did not write this answer for her, I promise. I’m also going to be using her answer for my holiday card to my siblings.) (Shua isn't the one in the middle in the below picture)
If pay, work hours, etc., weren’t an issue, what would be your dream job?
Probably the same thing I’m doing now – antiques. But I really would like a barn to work from! (Okay, that’s actually really cool that you’re already doing your dream job)
What are the most embarrassing things about Shua you can tell us? Please don’t hold back.
I don’t think any of my children have ever really embarrassed me. Well… not that much at least. When Shua was in kindergarten and I picked him up one day, we were in my truck and his teacher and I were talking. She was at the passenger window when Shua interrupted her, telling her, “You have a moustache!” (In my defense, she had a Wilford Brimley level moustache.) Also, when Shua was around three years old, any time he needed to use the bathroom he would totally remove all of his clothes. Even the shoes and socks came off! We never quite understood why. (I don’t have a good answer here, it’s just what I did.) One day when he was in the bathroom a little longer than I thought he should be, I opened the door and found this completely naked little boy sitting on the toilet, sound asleep. What a great picture! And no… I won’t share that photo!
What is the eeriest thing you have ever seen/encountered?
At a hoarder estate sale, an unidentifiable dead animal.
Describe what you were like at age ten.
A dork. But a nice dork. I loved to play outside, loved chasing bugs, and catching frogs and snakes. Hmmm… I guess I haven’t changed much. (I can attest. No matter how hard I tried as a kid by bringing home all kinds of creepy crawly critters, nothing even phased her. She was too busy being interested in the critters, which is where I learned it from. Now the neighbor kid’s mom on the other hand… if you even said the word spider, she’d run screaming out of the house.)
If you were handed $50,000 in cash and told it had to be used in the next 7 days to take a trip worth writing a book about, where would you go? What would you do?
This is a tough one! I would love to search out an old homestead… a farm with barns, maybe something abandoned, and search for good old primitive antiques. Most likely, this would be in the central part of the states where generations lived in the same home over the years. Old pie safes, tall cupboards, enamelware, and all other household items that have been used for hundreds of years. It would be fun to learn about the history of the item and have several photographs. Well… it would be fun for me! (I am not at all surprised that you would spend the $50k on antiquing. Also, what is a “pie safe”?)
Who is the best character on The Office? Defend your reasoning.
I can’t pick a favorite! Michael, Jim, Dwight – all favorites.
Pie, crisp, or cobbler? What flavor?
Probably a crisp or cobbler. Definitely some type of berry!
What is your dream vehicle?
I think an old and original pickup truck, from the late 40s to early 50s. I would also love a classic original Volkswagen van – the ones from the mid-60s with 21 windows. (Great choices, so long as the truck is a Ford.)
If you could meet anyone in the world dead or alive, who would it be and why?
I think my great-grandmother on my mother’s side, Sarah Ellen Matthews. She passed away a few years before I was born and I remember so many stories about her that my mom told me. Sounds like she was the best gramma ever. (According to your grandkids, you hold that title.)
Tell us two truths and two lies about yourself.
So, four things in no particular order? 1. I caught a small snake when I was 14 or 15 and put it in an empty coffee can with a lid to take it back to our campsite. When I showed it to my dad, unphased, he muttered, “Hmmm… you got a little rattlesnake there.” 2. I chased and caught a peacock that was running down the street and returned it to the owner. 3. I have traveled to 45 states in the US so far. 4. I own over 100 vintage motel chairs.
What made you laugh the hardest you’ve ever laughed in your life?
Nothing specific comes to mind, but probably watching the antics of an animal or small child… Laughing comes very easily for me. (If you want to get easy laughs out of Mama Verde, show her videos of people failing, but played in reverse. She’ll nearly laugh herself out of breath)
Do you have any phobias?
Not so much a phobia, but I really need to stay around until I’m about 125 years old. I have so much to do!
Who would win in a fight, you or Pentad?
I have no clue! (I’ll wager a lot of money on Mama Verde, she fights dirty and goes right for the soft meats.)
Why are you the way that you are?
I would say the way in which I was raised, by two amazing parents, was the greatest influence. I would also give credit to three wonderful children (each one being my favorite) (You already said I was your favorite. You can’t change that now) , and my three grandchildren. Being around all these people made and makes me always want to be a better human.
If you could wake up tomorrow being a master of a musical instrument and join any band in the world, what instrument would you play for what band?
My preference would be to have a beautiful voice and sing… if I had to also play an instrument, maybe a ukelele. I’m not sure if Willie is looking for someone who plays old country music on a ukelele though… (Now I’m picturing some weird mash-up of Somewhere Over the Rainbow and On the Road Again)
What is your favorite color, and why?
I have lots of favorites depending on how it’s used… silver for a truck, turquoise to wear, white/off-white/ivory for walls, black for a purse, pink because I’m a girl, red for lots of things.
If you were a meal, what would you be?
A salad with all kinds of ingredients.
What is the best compliment you have ever received?
That I was the nicest person he’d ever met. How boring is that!?!
What is the craziest thing you have ever done?
Drove a go-kart down the street as fast as I could go and turned onto a busy street, narrowly missing being runover by a bus. (How have I never heard this story???)
What is the most embarrassing story about yourself that you’re willing to share?
When you’re a youngster, you are embarrassed easily. I think I was about 8 and was at our local public pool swimming. I didn’t want to swim over to the steps to get out so I tried to climb out on the side. But… my knee got stuck in the “trough” (where splashed water goes so it doesn’t leave the pool). No amount of pushing or pulling helped. The next thing I knew, two fire trucks arrived with sirens blaring to help… (I’m not laughing, I’m not laughing, I’m not laughing, I’m not laughing…)
What color would your lightsaber be, and why?
I think turquoise. Are they available in that color?
You’ve lived a long time on this planet, what would you say are the three biggest historical events of your lifetime?
Is that an “old” joke??? (Maybe) Sadly, most of the events I can think of are tragedies…
Can you share some of the strangest/most interesting things you’ve found in your career as an antique dealer?
Bedroom “toys”, loaded guns, dead animals (and I’m not talking about taxidermy), close to $10k in coins, nude photos, human teeth… (I think readers would agree, you need your own reality show if you’re finding stuff like this)
If you could own any single antique/collectible/artifact on the planet, what would it be?
An enormous cabinet from a general store with everything original. I have no idea where it would go, but I would love to have one.
If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
The ability to go back in time any time I wanted to and for as long as I wanted to. (Where would you go first?)
What book or movie would you most want to have if you were stranded on a desert island?
I would like pens and blank notebooks to write my own book.
If Shua hadn’t gone into banking, what career path do you think would have been the best fit? Why?
Something VERY techy… something in the field of science, possibly a professor.
What would be the best advice/wisdom that you can share with Clan Truth?
1. Be kind to children and old people. (But fuck everyone in between, right?) 2. Choose your battles!
If a stranger had offered to purchase Shua from you at any stage before adulthood, what age would you have been most tempted to sell him and for how much money?
No f'ing way I would have EVER parted with him for ANY amount of money. (Aww shucks. I know that isn’t true, but I feel special now)
Are you more of a lover or a fighter?
Definitely a lover!
Is cereal soup? Why or why not?
Ewww… not unless you use a LOT of milk.
What do you think about Shua’s OnlyFans page? Have you seen it?
I’m sure I would LOVE it! (Anyone else uncomfortable? I am.)
If you could have a well-trained exotic pet of any kind, what would it be?
I don’t have much interest in any exotic pet – creatures like that need to be in their natural environment. I’ll stick with a dog.
Is there anything else you would like to tell us about yourself that we haven’t covered yet?
I am not the dirty old lady Shua claims I am. (Yes, yes she is. She’s where I get it from.)
Thank you Mama Verde for taking the time for this interview!